“You may request a full refund of your emotional investment at any time”

From now on, when privileged white dudes complain I’ve hurt their precious feelings, they’re getting a stock message.

“I’m sorry you’ve had this experience. As an emotional service provider, I’ve been trained from birth to provide emotional support for men, and to place their needs above my own. The male should feel at all times as if he is being coddled, admired, and doted upon. If our service has not completely satisfied your needs, you may request a full refund of your emotional investment at any time.”

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